“Bozos on the Bus”

Each person has history, much of which can seem to be unremarkable. Each day a new day but for the most part, very similar to the day before. But then suddenly, colliding with the synchronicities of someone else’s life, there is a meeting of souls. It is unprovoked, unexpected and out of sync with the rest of one’s current situation. But it is stunningly impactful and intense, taking the place of whatever either person imagined to encounter. Everything is the odd thing, but there seems to be familiarity, and things and experiences that are common to both. What is this? What does one do with this strange collision of souls? Well, there is only one way when it concerns love. Either one is all-in or one is not. There is no half way to have this experience.

But is it possible that this “connection” though is more simply be “the art” of a manipulator, a man who, on first encounter recognizes something in the other person and uses the gift of gab and charm as weapons to reflect the feelings of this other so that it passes as connection? Could he be someone who has learned how to turn every experience with another soul into food for sustenance for his ego? Things are rarely so perfect. Hmmm.

Ego distorts and self-directs all actions in love relationships. It consumes all of the energy from them. And the person behind the ego can never experience the love potential with another human being. Actions are not authentic but all trickery and strategy, which after so many years is well-honed for implementation on most of the people encountered, poor love-sick souls with no understanding of what it is to truly love someone. The circumstances of this meeting were unexpected and not result of an active search.

I had a very good friend who used to refer to people as “bozos on the bus”, which is the title of a 1971 comedy album by Firesign Theatre. When I complained about some senseless act that someone might have done, in response he would say, “Ah, we’re all just bozos on the bus.”; using this reference for everyone because it allows us to forgive our foibles and not to expect so much of each other.

Forgiveness, it is extremely powerful and one of the very best things that we can do for other people and for ourselves. So I forgive when I need to because after all, we are all “bozos on the bus”.

Truth is Beauty is Love is God

May this new year bring love and light to everyone,

Char

Dedicated to “M”.

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A few years ago, I was grappling with a health condition which defied understanding of several medical professionals. After extensive online research, I myself would come to discover what was keeping me ill. The process was draining and exhausting. One day, at my desk wondering where else to look for answers, I folded my arms and rested my head. I seemed to be falling asleep as a memory from my childhood, of a summer that I visited with my grandparents at their farm in Virginia drifted into my mind. It was a very clear recollection of what happened so long ago so I started to write everything that was coming to me.

Here is an excerpt of what turned out to be a 50-page novelette.

This is the 4th chapter where I tell of the night my grandfather picked up my mother and me from the train station in Fredericksburg, Va.

4

My grandfather’s forest green Buick was quite the automobile with plush seats that reminded me of our living room couch. It was round like cars were then, with huge chrome grill adorning the front of it. The doors closed with an impressive sound, firm and solid, and inside there was a slight scent of musk from having been parked for long periods of time, I imagined, in reserve for special occasions. Buffed to a high sheen and with the occasional scent possessed by new cars, we made our way through the dark night under a sky as I had never seen it; so filled with stars with practically no space at all between them. “We don’t get to see so many stars back home do we? Isn’t it beautiful?” she said. I turned to the rear window. The entire sky seemed to defy the passage of the vehicle as did the farmhouses, trees, and roadside mailboxes. I began to feel very small and insignificant as I turned back around and closer to my mother.

From the highway the tires ground onto a narrow dirt road. As we rumbled along the air became moist, cool; filled with the many unfamiliar scents of the countryside. The startling awareness of skunk was somewhat softened by the sweet surprise of wild honeysuckle that my mother said grew wildly along the length of a fence. The Buick’s headlamps captured husks growing low on towering cornstalks. The crop had grown out over the sides of the road threatening to swallow the car as well, but only the sound, reduced to a soft rumble was forfeited, as it flumped up and over the bumps in the road and in and out of the ditches. With yellow cones of light showing the way, the night was teeming with fluttering ethereal life forms darting in and out, and the relentless sound of a million crickets. 

Through the darkness we walked along a small path toward the light of the farmhouse to find my Grandmother waiting by the kitchen door. Her smiling eyes were mere crescents above cheeks like apples and her braid was coiled and pinned back. She was shorter than she seemed from the stories my mother had told about her. I remember never having been as completely hugged as I was that day within her full bosom, smelling of the coconut cake that was at the center of the table in the old country kitchen. I felt known and loved in the most reassuring way. And I thought that she must have heard many stories about me as well, and that eventually I would discover somewhere in this house without mantels, the baby-in-pink with-teddy picture that other seldom visited relatives all seemed to possess. After a glass of lemonade and a piece of the coconut cake, I was shuttled off to bed as the elders lingered over a pitcher of tea. I remember that the smokehouse hickory seemed to be everywhere, even in the sheets with the little red roses that I slept on that night.

Two Little Girls by Charon Diane

Available through my publisher, Booklocker. 

  http://booklocker.com/books/4718.html

and:

Barnes & Noble

https://barnesandnoble.com/w/two-little-girls-charon-diane/1022157163?ean=9781609101374

You are amazing!  Create something beautiful today!

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Narcissus

In conversations with him, she doesn’t seem to be the author of the things that she says.

She doesn’t recognize herself.

At these times, she is as much of an observer of herself as he is.

She surprises herself with this knowing, but moreover, intrigued by all of what happens between them.

She is what he allows her to be.

He is charming and handsome.

He is proud and confident.

For the experience he wants to have, she is the source.

He doesn’t know her.

“The mind is a terrible thing to waste.”

Sometime in the 1970s, there was a tv commercial by The United Negro College Fund which ended with this line. It was a commercial promoting the significance of education. Not sure if I’ve used the correct article; it could have declared “A” mind, etc. None the less the message remains the same.

What/who do we rely upon to inform us? Have we actually given thought to this question? I will guess many people have never. We are provided unsolicited information, answers to questions never asked. We live in a fast-paced environment leaving little space and time for our minds to ponder, to reach the place from where questions arise. We need not put in the effort, ultimately accepting data bombarding our senses. What is wrong here? Everything goes along smoothly so what could be wrong with this?

Well, in the presence of overwhelming information and distractions, we may have completely lost connection with what could be our own thoughts. But would we notice this phenomenon at all?

Observing trending ideologies, I am amazed with how easily they take root and grow; how readily accepted, that questions asked by a person who pauses to think before accepting information seems to be an irritant to others who accept without question whatever is presented. People can even become violent in their beliefs which I contend are not actually their own. The worst of this is that most likely, they won’t realize this. In so many areas of their lives, they haven’t had to actually think things through, so they don’t know that they have this natural ability. They don’t know the valuable resource within themselves. And the thinking person is a fright, a danger to their stability and safety. They put up defenses. They will argue a point, not realizing the genesis of which is not of themselves. They are not accustomed to being present with themselves.

We are feeling, experiencing how detrimental this has become for our society.

Ha! I actually had a client, a young woman, who once remarked that she doesn’t like to think!

Take time. Put in the work. Go within. Ask questions!

Love to all!

Char

Lost in the Ether

The following statement, I understand, was made by one of the brothers in Dostoyevsky’s novel, The Brothers Karamazov. I cannot verify this statement that I heard over the radio one day in the recent past. On my cursory search here on the internet, I have found only parts of the statement and also many refuting the existence of it at all. I have not read the book in which it is alleged to be found, but the words ring true of the world in which we find ourselves.

Char

The statement:

If there is no belief in God, then all things are possible. Then there is no right or wrong and the most powerful people rule the world.

Attributed to Fyodor Dostoyevsky, Russian Novelist

1821-1881

Colossians 1:16-17
For in Him all things were created, things in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or dominions or rulers or authorities. All things were created through Him and for Him. / He is before all things, and in Him all things hold together.

Be love.

Bless you all.

Char

Your Treasure

Finding the truth of things requires time and experience, most times.

We set our hearts on things. We can get lost in the feelings. But we can be our very own and very best friend by being honest and truthful, with ourselves.

This is a resources that we all have.

What will happen when you make a best friend of yourself? One thing is that you relieve your friends from the burden of what you can do for yourself. You can see your friends in a different way. You can love them more and freely, without expectations.

Ha! Ain’t that grand?

There is so much more to this.

More later.

Love to all!

Know this

For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.

2 Timothy 1:7

Hate-lite

What is the nature of the things we find ourselves doing, saying or thinking? Are they loving?

Love.

All other emotions are degrees of negativity.

Deeply-seated as self-doubt can be,

or surface-level, seething anger,

there’s scathing commentary, overwhelmingly appropriate at the time so it seemed, but in retrospect, regret is the one and only recollection,

and that bit of jealousy of withholding a sentiment that freely expressed might have “made the day” for someone.

You know it would have.

If God, the Heavenly Father is Love, than what is the source of all of the other emotions?

Choose love, my Loves!

Truthfully

Picture1207151525_1

Someone said:

There exists only two emotions…

                                                              love

                                                                                                and everything else.

Truthfully

Picture1207151525_1

Someone said:

There exists only two emotions…

                                                              love

and everything else.

 

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Years had gone by without a single thought of the time in 1957 when I spent the summer with my grandparents on their farm in Virginia.  Then, in the midst of a prolonged illness, among all of the things my mind was sorting through, this forgotten experience drifted in.  Totally unprovoked and effortlessly revealing, I felt the need to write everything that I could remember, just as it presented itself to me.

And as I wrote, I became more and more immersed within the warmth and comfort of that time with my grandparents, so precious and dear to me now, as I realize after all, how much meaning it brought to my life.

This glimpse into their world was written with love and a deep and ever-growing appreciation for my family, for my heritage.  It might well have been entitled , “The Gift”.

                                                                        Truth is Beauty is Love

Two Little Girls by Charon Diane

http://booklocker.com/books/4718.html

https://barnesandnoble.com/w/two-little-girls-charon-                                              diane/1022157163?ean=9781609101374

https://www.amazon.com/Two-Little-Girls-Charon-Diane/dp/1609101375

 

* An excerpt from my book:

Two Little Girls

Chapter 1

As far as I was concerned, summer began with the day my father installed the screens in the windows. Early that morning, Mother would have taken the summer sheers from storage to the clothesline in our backyard. By the afternoon, she swooped up the freshened bundle and brought them back indoors to hang on the rods at the tops of the windows. When the transformation was complete, I’d run from room to room to see the curtains flying on the breeze that raced in through the windows of our big old house. Like a magical invitation to adventures possible only with summer, when one day melted into the next and no one asked about the time, I felt that I could fly too and that anything could happen.

There were 5 children in my family. My brother Lionel was the oldest; my sister Cecilia was next, followed by my sister Rose, then my brother Isaac, and me. We spent summertime totally absorbed in keeping pace with our friends as was our Mother in keeping up with us. She mended our scraped knees, our bruised egos, and the holes in my brothers’ dungarees. I remember lemonade and tuna sandwiches, cotton sun dresses and hair ribbons; the pennies I collected for the corner candy store, and my ankle socks that never stayed up. Summers seemed much longer then when hopscotch and jump rope, hide-and-seek and tag, dress-up and make-believe, with my bicycle, my dolls and friends filled the days until supper time. When August finally came around, among the five of us someone would be chosen to vacation with our grandparents in the country. It was in the year 1957 that I was to spend my first summer there.

I’d thought so often about my first trip to the farm. But like the landing of a cascading boulder, my mother’s cheerful delivery of this summer’s plan completely shattered my vision of it. Leaving little room for the way that reality alters things but similar to most events concerning “the children”, I was quite certain of my unvarying reverie. It was always the same.  My brothers and sisters are running through a country field with me, very happily and as usual, following close behind. But everything had been arranged and I alone would spend two weeks on the farm that year.

My family had gathered in the living room when Mother made the announcement. But my frustrating lack of enthusiasm was like a call to dinner in emptying the room of everyone and I found myself alone, save for the dog. While I struggled with the concept of being on my own, Spiky jumped onto the couch next to me. Placing his head upon my foot he kept a concerned and watchful eye over my disposition until we both fell asleep.

Later that day, I listened to Dad’s recollections of farm life adventures while Mother prepared supper. As she filled in with the finer points and particulars she’d taken note of my mixed feelings with her knowing smile that always took the sharp edges off of things. “Don’t forget that your cousin Joanna is just about your age and lives close to Grandpa‘s”, she nearly whispered. Then I thought of the pocket inside the little green suitcase as the place where my Jacks would find a perfect fit.

                                          ~~~~~~~ Truth is Beauty is Love ~~~~~~