Mother and Father

There are times when life defies understanding, the information we want, that we think we should have while experiencing a moment. Understanding may come later, unexpectedly, inconveniently. We may have settled with our current knowing so this revelation can also be obtrusive. But it is undeniable. We recognize a solved mystery revealed, but now we also have long ago adapted ourselves to make up for unanswered questions. We are fine now. But this understanding comes just the same.

Along with this, I think of my parents today. They were so very down to earth, no nonsense. I wanted a little more fluff, like I saw with my friend’s families. But Mother and Dad would have none of that. They were completely aware and not without aspirations but theirs were completely customized to fit their lives and not a carbon copy of anyone else. Eventually Mother and Dad moved our family into a big, stone house on 1/4 acre in a wonderful town. It was the envy of many, including the “fluffy” people. That’s the way that they were, patient and determined in reaching their aspirations.

Mother was highly admired for her leadership, her strength, her drive, her vision. She was unique. She envied no one. She set her sites on a thing and off she went in that direction., fashionably dressed, striking and confident, beautiful. People wanted to know her.

My Father was a quiet giant. He was strong in his beliefs and resolve. When he spoke you listened, you remembered because he wasted no words. He was quite handsome and he adored my Mother. Both strong individuals, my parents, but quite different in their approach in maintaining their strengths.

Looking back now, what has come to mind today, the understanding, is my parents approach to teaching discipline, responsibility, character and integrity; not with so many words, but by the way in which we were left to decide how to behave. They laid down the law and gave us the freedom to follow through. And having garnered our admiration and respect for them, my brothers, my sisters, and I seemed most times to come to the right decision that kept us in line and taught the tough lessons.

My parents were not averse to using the strap. I could tell a couple of stories about that, maybe later. (Spare the rod and spoil the child.). But I realize how intelligent they were. The simple way that they had with teaching and with most everything. They often told me just to look and listen. Don’t ask so many questions. Now this was completely in opposition to what we were taught in school. I often felt that I needed to ask more questions; how I might not be as smart as the ones in class who were constantly asking questions. But as it turns out, my parents were so right in their approach. Most of my questions were answered and in the most significant way. Those answers came during the course of a lesson if I just paid attention. And because of allowing myself the time to receive the answers, they were so much more valuable as the process involved only me. I received the information in the way for my mind to comprehend (we all have our unique way) instead of having to try to understand someone else’s interpretation or significant take on a subject. It was mine and will continue to be mine, foundational, solid, but open to further clarity and substance. I am not purporting that questions should not be asked in class at school, but only if one is inclined to ask, after listening. And at that point in time, more often than not, you may not have questions. I hope this makes sense.

And as always, with love,

Char

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We tend to forget many of the experiences that we’ve had, and easily so as some are truly forgettable, others regrettable, and still others simply because we must get on with our lives.  Some events, though we may not think of them when they occur as pertinent or relevant, remain with us somewhere deep inside.

For months I’d been struggling with a perplexing issue which seemed to defy resolution.  I was bound on all sides with thinking about it, when suddenly a forgotten memory emerged.  Shapes, colors, and details became part of the air around me, dancing in concert to form a story that I would tell in a little book that I would write.

This extraordinary experience of my childhood took place in 1957 in Virginia. As I wrote the words, I felt warm and comforting support for a time that I spent with my grandparents, so very dear to me now. Until the time of writing, I was unaware of how much meaning that summer had brought to my life.   How impossible that it was safe in my heart all along!  It is a story of love and an ever-growing appreciation for my family.  It might well have been entitled , “The Gift”.

Here is an excerpt from my novelette:

Two Little Girls

Chapter 1

As far as I was concerned, summer began with the day my father installed the screens in the windows. Early that morning, Mother would have taken the summer sheers from storage to the clothesline in our backyard. By the afternoon, she swooped up the freshened bundle and brought them back indoors to hang on the rods at the tops of the windows. When the transformation was complete, I’d run from room to room to see the curtains flying on the breeze that raced in through the windows of our big old house. Like a magical invitation to adventures possible only with summer, when one day melted into the next and no one asked about the time, I felt that I could fly too and that anything could happen.

There were 5 children in my family. My brother Lionel was the oldest; my sister Cecilia was next, followed by my sister Rose, then my brother Isaac, and me. We spent summertime totally absorbed in keeping pace with our friends as was our Mother in keeping up with us. She mended our scraped knees, our bruised egos, and the holes in my brothers’ dungarees. I remember lemonade and tuna sandwiches, cotton sun dresses and hair ribbons; the pennies I collected for the corner candy store, and my ankle socks that never stayed up. Summers seemed much longer then when hopscotch and jump rope, hide-and-seek and tag, dress-up and make believe, with my bicycle, my dolls and friends filled the days until supper time. When August finally came around, among the five of us someone would be chosen to vacation with our grandparents in the country. It was in the year 1957 that I was to spend my first summer there.

I’d thought so often about my first trip to the farm. But like the landing of a cascading boulder, my mother’s cheerful delivery of this summer’s plan completely shattered my vision of it. Leaving little room for the way that reality alters things but similar to most events concerning “the children”, I was quite certain of my unvarying reverie. It was always the same.  My brothers and sisters are running through a country field with me, very happily and as usual, following close behind. But everything had been arranged and I alone would spend two weeks on the farm that year.

My family had gathered in the living room when Mother made the announcement. But my frustrating lack of enthusiasm was like a call to dinner in emptying the room of everyone and I found myself alone, save for the dog. While I struggled with the concept of being on my own, Spiky jumped onto the couch next to me. Placing his head upon my foot he kept a concerned and watchful eye over my disposition until we both fell asleep.

Later that day, I listened to Dad’s recollections of farm life adventures while Mother prepared supper. As she filled in with the finer points and particulars she’d taken note of my mixed feelings with her knowing smile that always took the sharp edges off of things. “Don’t forget that your cousin Joanna is just about your age and lives close to Grandpa‘s”, she nearly whispered. Then I thought of the pocket inside the little green suitcase as the place where my Jacks would find a perfect fit.

                        ~~~~~~~ Truth is Beauty is Love ~~~~~~

You are amazing.  Create something beautiful today!

Two Little Girls by Charon Diane

Available through my publisher, Booklocker:  

http://booklocker.com/books/4718.html

also

Barnes & Noble

https://barnesandnoble.com/w/two-little-girls-charon-diane/1022157163?ean=9781609101374

and

Amazon.com

Kindle only. Type in “charon diane”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Carson Wentz

Carson Wentz of the Philadelphia Eagles warms up on the field before a game against the Cleveland Browns at Lincoln Financial Field on September 11,...

Photo source: Getty Images

This is interesting. So as I transition my wardrobe from summer to fall, I find this comment on a post-it note at the bottom of one of one of my favorite handbags that I decided to put into circulation again this year.

It has to have been there for years, at least from 2017 when Carson was quarterback for the Philadelphia Eagles football team.

I recall nothing of its origin and can only hope it is an actual quote from Carson. But if is not, it should have been.

Love to everyone,

Char

“If you are not rooted in God’s word, this world will eat you up.”

“The mind is a terrible thing to waste.”

Sometime in the 1970s, there was a tv commercial by The United Negro College Fund which ended with this line. It was a commercial promoting the significance of education. Not sure if I’ve used the correct article; it could have declared “A” mind, etc. None the less the message remains the same.

What/who do we rely upon to inform us? Have we actually given thought to this question? I will guess many people have never. We are provided unsolicited information, answers to questions never asked. We live in a fast-paced environment leaving little space and time for our minds to ponder, to reach the place from where questions arise. We need not put in the effort, ultimately accepting data bombarding our senses. What is wrong here? Everything goes along smoothly so what could be wrong with this?

Well, in the presence of overwhelming information and distractions, we may have completely lost connection with what could be our own thoughts. But would we notice this phenomenon at all?

Observing trending ideologies, I am amazed with how easily they take root and grow; how readily accepted, that questions asked by a person who pauses to think before accepting information seems to be an irritant to others who accept without question whatever is presented. People can even become violent in their beliefs which I contend are not actually their own. The worst of this is that most likely, they won’t realize this. In so many areas of their lives, they haven’t had to actually think things through, so they don’t know that they have this natural ability. They don’t know the valuable resource within themselves. And the thinking person is a fright, a danger to their stability and safety. They put up defenses. They will argue a point, not realizing the genesis of which is not of themselves. They are not accustomed to being present with themselves.

We are feeling, experiencing how detrimental this has become for our society.

Ha! I actually had a client, a young woman, who once remarked that she doesn’t like to think!

Take time. Put in the work. Go within. Ask questions!

Love to all!

Char

Lost in the Ether

The following statement, I understand, was made by one of the brothers in Dostoyevsky’s novel, The Brothers Karamazov. I cannot verify this statement that I heard over the radio one day in the recent past. On my cursory search here on the internet, I have found only parts of the statement and also many refuting the existence of it at all. I have not read the book in which it is alleged to be found, but the words ring true of the world in which we find ourselves.

Char

The statement:

If there is no belief in God, then all things are possible. Then there is no right or wrong and the most powerful people rule the world.

Attributed to Fyodor Dostoyevsky, Russian Novelist

1821-1881

Colossians 1:16-17
For in Him all things were created, things in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or dominions or rulers or authorities. All things were created through Him and for Him. / He is before all things, and in Him all things hold together.

Be love.

Bless you all.

Char

Who Are You?

photo by Alexey Kijatov

We may think we know ourselves, but unless and until we determine and identify the various aspects of our personality, I wonder how can we truly know.

I may not be describing this as well as I might, but this is how it seems to me.

We should have an awareness of what is important to us, what we keep within us; such as:.

What we believe.

What we will not tolerate.

We we must always do in every situation.

What we will never allow ourselves to do in any situation, and so on.

And what are the things that we expect of other people who enter our lives, etc. etc..

Each person brings a pre-determined standard along with every encounter, otherwise we are vulnerable to any well-phrased opinion, especially by someone we admire.

Speaking of this, you may give credibility to someone, an eloquent speaker with a well spring of knowledge, very convincing, charismatic and engaging. But what if something that is said comes against a standard that you have for yourself…a standard that you actually have, but have not determined or recognized as such?

Maybe you paid to be in the audience of this person. You are enjoying what you are hearing. Then suddenly, the person says something that is a little irritating, just “a little bit” (channelling De Niro’s character from the movie Goodfellas, haha!). The person has captured your attention and has your trust and respect. But still, you find what has just been uttered to be slightly irritating. It doesn’t fit. Their narrative should resonate with you; you expected it to have. You are annoyed with yourself because of this intrusive and inconvenient feeling. You want it to go away. You wait to hear something that overrides this initial response within you, bringing the speaker back in line with what you expect to hear. You invested in this moment after all. Are you the only one who feels this way? It may seem to be only with you.

In a very real way it is only you. It is personal.

Whether you have actually given thought to this or not, you have a guidance system. And it may come as a surprise to find how unconsciousness you can be of it, and how it works with and for you.

I would like to suggest that you take a moment to identify what makes you who you are by getting to know your silent guidance system. What are your morals and standards for yourself, and for others? It may take a while because who can name every thing, and you have not thought In this way before, not like this? But it can be very enlightening. And the irritation that you felt with the person of many opinions, well, you will probably come to realize has something to do with your internal guidance system.

Discovering yourself by naming the things that make you who you are can be a lot of fun and a little surprising! But what is even more significant, is realizing there is a system at work all of the time. Trust that it is sorting things out for you. And, while identifying your guidance system, you may find that some things could be changed, in order to be your authentic self! If you are clearly and honestly identifying what guides you, you may want to actually make a change or two. With determined and thorough examination, you may have found by identifying all that is guiding you, that changes can be made! Each of us, we are evolving all of the time. So taking this look of what is guiding us can be thought of as maintenance; making sure that we are aligned with ourselves in the present time.

It is a hell of a thing! Residing within you may be a standard that has the ability to, and may have taken you in directions that you didn’t intend to go, and what a revelation this could be for you, more over how empowering that you control this! You have always been in control.

Well, now with this new-found consciousness of the control that you have always had, I think now as I write this, that there is also, and no less significant, the opportunity to forgive yourself for decisions you may have made, unconsciously!

Taking inventory of your guidance system and realizing the control you actually have in the creation of the life you live may be time very well spent.

Wow. Wee!!!

“Thoughts create things!” (this is a quote from in the movie, The Secret)

Get to know your guidance system. You may need an update!

Get to know yourself!

Have fun!

Love to all!

Char

Your Treasure

Finding the truth of things requires time and experience, most times.

We set our hearts on things. We can get lost in the feelings. But we can be our very own and very best friend by being honest and truthful, with ourselves.

This is a resources that we all have.

What will happen when you make a best friend of yourself? One thing is that you relieve your friends from the burden of what you can do for yourself. You can see your friends in a different way. You can love them more and freely, without expectations.

Ha! Ain’t that grand?

There is so much more to this.

More later.

Love to all!

Every Single Thing

“Jesus said unto him, If thou canst believe, all things are possible to him that believeth.”

Mark 9:23

Now this one may take most of a lifetime to grasp.

We each have our own beliefs. They are based on life experiences, from the very beginning of awareness. When matters turn in our favor, we feel confirmation for the thing that guided us to act in a certain way. When we are not favored, that can lead to feelings of powerlessness. And we try again and again to prove that we are right. And we defend our position with every bit of our will. We may surrender friends and family members who don’t support our beliefs. We may even die with our inability to consider the possibility that we may be wrong. Yes, being right is that important to some people, because otherwise, there must be something else that has control then, right? Well this is the truly frightening concept for us. We fear the unknown, most terribly. So we stay vigilant, stalwart in our beliefs that we tirelessly defend. We may isolate ourselves from any challenging opposition to what we have come to “know” is true.

And after the earthquake a fire; but the LORD was not in the fire: and after the fire a still small voice.

1 Kings 19:12

How absolutely profound, “a still small voice“.

He is there…always.

This world of distractions keeps us from hearing Him. We are used to thinking about and responding to noise, as though significance must come with a bang. We miss the beauty of stillness, the knowledge that is there, the love.

Everything that happens is to bring you closer to the Creator…every, single, thing.

Realizing and accepting this truth…then everything makes sense and falls into place.

All is understood for how it was meant to be in your life. All is in harmony, with The Divine.

Change fears to prayers!

For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.

2 Timothy 1:7

...And I will do whatever you ask in My name, so that the Father may be glorified in the Son. / If you ask Me for anything in My name, I will do it.

John 14:12-14

Love to all,

Char

Everything is a gift!

Know this

For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.

2 Timothy 1:7

“Don’t worry, Dear.”

…so said my mother. Always commenting on my propensity to think “too much” about things…”Go out to play.” was her common refrain, and rightfully so, I suppose. She had no better thoughts for the direction of my mind, heaven bless her.

It was a very long time ago but I remember clearly of visiting the farm in Virginia in the summer of 1957. As the days unfolded I became completely aware of the extraordinary experience of the farm life, of how it was for my grandparents.

Granddad used 2 buckets to collect water from a well. The quenching of thrist, cooking, cleaning and laundry, bathing and brushing teeth made possible only with the water my granddad collected from the well and carried to the farmhouse, every day of the year.

By contrast in Philadelphia, our water was managed by a system and people that we would never see or get to know. The flip of a switch or the turn of a knob provided all utilities for the household. And subsequently and without fail, there appeard every month on the floor below the mail slot of the front door a bill for services rendered. How completely convenient for us! Poor Granddad.

But then, hadn’t Granddad chosen to abandon his indoor plumbing after it failed? Hadn’t he simply gone back to his tried and true reliable way of the well?
So the child wondered, “What would our family do if one day, the switching of switches and the turning of knobs produced nothing at all?”

For a little more of my grandfather I include this excerpt from my book:

Two Little Girls

Chapter 6

My grandfather preferred a simple life, unencumbered and close to nature and the freedom that self-sufficiency permitted. With two helpers, he was able to take care of the business of the farm and remained staunchly independent.

I remember that the sink and faucets were actually little more than furniture for the old country kitchen. Mother had told of a costly repair after which Grandfather surmised that the sink would continue on in this way, “costing more than it was worth”. Eventually, he abandoned it completely in favor of towing water from his well as he was so used to doing. Two silvery buckets were housed on the back porch for the purpose. The well was at the bottom of a small hill. Moss grew in the spaces between the stone which remained cold on the hottest summer day. It was surrounded by wood planks as the area would be swollen with rain following a storm. Several days had passed before I would accept that the frog residing there hadn’t rendered it unfit for its function of providing clean drinking water. But what I recollect is the cold, crystal clear, and sweet taste of the water from the old farm well.

Canvas Sack for Tire Chains

The Rappahannock River was in walking distance to my grandparent’s home. There were horses, cows, pigs, chickens and ducks; a smoke house, a barn for the animals and a tool barn. I remember the huge log pile just beyond the fence between the two barns. My grandmother tended a large garden providing all manner of vegetables and fruits. A pumpkin patch flourished on one side and watermelon on the other. I remember the tomatoes were biggest I’d ever seen. There was an apple tree, and a peach, and pear tree. Two large shade trees grew at each side of the front porch. And one of them had a rope swing that I loved. Swinging to and fro I could socialize with my grandparents, exchanging pleasantries between the pages of Grand pop’s comic books that he enjoyed reading at the end of the day, and with my grandmother, from her chair on the porch, as she prepared our supper vegetables for cooking on the old wood stove.

Grandmother’s Canning Jars

Two Little Girls is available at my publisher’s website:

         http://booklocker.com/books/4718.html

Also available at Barnes and Noble:

https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/two-little-girls-charon-diane/1022157163?ean=2940014433099

and at Amazon:

        https://www.amazon.com/s?                                                                          k=two+little+girls+charon+diane&ref=nb_sb_noss_2

Have a beautiful day!

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Worth Repeating

In grade school, my class was given the assignment to memorize this poem by Rudyard Kipling. We recited it together in class. It comes to mind as I think of my children.

char

If

Rudyard KiplingBy Rudyard Kipling

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too:
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or, being lied about, don’t deal in lies,
Or being hated don’t give way to hating,
And yet don’t look too good, nor talk too wise;

If you can dream – and not make dreams your master;
If you can think – and not make thoughts your aim,
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same:.
If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build’em up with worn-out tools;

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings,
And never breathe a word about your loss:
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: “Hold on!”

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with Kings – nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
If all men count with you, but none too much:
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds’ worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it,
And – which is more – you’ll be a Man, my son!

Source: https://www.familyfriendpoems.com/poem/if-by-rudyard-kipling

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My book!

Two Little Girls by Charon Diane

http://booklocker.com/books/4718.html

https://barnesandnoble.com/w/two-little-girls-charon-                                              diane/1022157163?ean=9781609101374

We tend to forget many of the experiences that we’ve had, and easily so as some are truly forgettable, others regrettable, and still others simply because we must get on with our lives.  Some events, though we may not think of them when they occur as pertinent or relevant, remain with us somewhere deep inside.

For months I’d been struggling with a perplexing issue which seemed to defy resolution.  I was bound on all sides with thinking about it, when suddenly a forgotten memory emerged.  Shapes, colors, and details became part of the air around me, dancing in concert to form a story that I would tell in a little book that I would write.

This extraordinary experience of my childhood took place in 1957 in Virginia. As I wrote the words, I felt warm and comforting support for a time that I spent with my grandparents, so very dear to me now.  Until the time of writing, I was unaware of how much meaning the summer had brought to my life.   How impossible that it was safe in my heart all along   It is a story of love and an ever-growing appreciation for my family.  It might well have been entitled , “The Gift”.

Here is an excerpt from my novelette:

Two Little Girls

Chapter 1

As far as I was concerned, summer began with the day my father installed the screens in the windows. Early that morning, Mother would have taken the summer sheers from storage to the clothesline in our backyard. By the afternoon, she swooped up the freshened bundle and brought them back indoors to hang on the rods at the tops of the windows. When the transformation was complete, I’d run from room to room to see the curtains flying on the breeze that raced in through the windows of our big old house. Like a magical invitation to adventures possible only with summer, when one day melted into the next and no one asked about the time, I felt that I could fly too and that anything could happen.

There were 5 children in my family. My brother Lionel was the oldest; my sister Cecilia was next, followed by my sister Rose, then my brother Isaac, and me. We spent summertime totally absorbed in keeping pace with our friends as was our Mother in keeping up with us. She mended our scraped knees, our bruised egos, and the holes in my brothers’ dungarees. I remember lemonade and tuna sandwiches, cotton sun dresses and hair ribbons; the pennies I collected for the corner candy store, and my ankle socks that never stayed up. Summers seemed much longer then when hopscotch and jump rope, hide-and-seek and tag, dress-up and make-believe, with my bicycle, my dolls and friends filled the days until suppertime. When August finally came around, among the five of us someone would be chosen to vacation with our grandparents in the country. It was in the year 1957 that I was to spend my first summer there.

I’d thought so often about my first trip to the farm. But like the landing of a cascading boulder, my mother’s cheerful delivery of this summer’s plan completely shattered my vision of it. Leaving little room for the way that reality alters things but similar to most events concerning “the children”, I was quite certain of my unvarying reverie. It was always the same.  My brothers and sisters are running through a country field with me, very happily and as usual, following close behind. But everything had been arranged and I alone would spend two weeks on the farm that year.

My family had gathered in the living room when Mother made the announcement. But my frustrating lack of enthusiasm was like a call to dinner in emptying the room of everyone and I found myself alone, save for the dog. While I struggled with the concept of being on my own, Spiky jumped onto the couch next to me. Placing his head upon my foot he kept a concerned and watchful eye over my disposition until we both fell asleep.

Later that day, I listened to Dad’s recollections of farm life adventures while Mother prepared supper. As she filled in with the finer points and particulars she’d taken note of my mixed feelings with her knowing smile that always took the sharp edges off of things. “Don’t forget that your cousin Joanna is just about your age and lives close to Grandpa‘s”, she nearly whispered. Then I thought of the pocket inside the little green suitcase as the place where my Jacks would find a perfect fit.

                                          ~~~~~~~ Truth is Beauty is Love ~~~~~~

You are amazing.  Create something beautiful today!